De Amerikaanse komiek heeft thuis vier dochters rondlopen, waarvan de oudste 7 jaar oud is. Of het nu over opruimen, Tamagotchi's of het weer gaat, stuk voor stuk deelt hij zijn grappige conversaties met de koters op Twitter. Ondertussen heeft 32-jarige Breakwell al een trouw publiek van meer dan een miljoen volgers opgebouwd. Wij selecteerden enkele van zijn meest geslaagde tweets.
5-year-old: Are we having pizza?!
Me: Not tonight.
5: You hurt my heart.
James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) 28 december 2017
5-year-old: *heading out with Mom* Dad?
5-year-old: How can it be so cold when it's light outside?
Me: I don't know.
5: The sun is broken.
James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) 2 januari 2018
Me: I made all the beds.
5-year-old: A store made the beds. You just put blankets on them.
James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) 1 januari 2018
5-year-old: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
5: Me.
Me: That's not a good joke.
5: Neither are yours.
James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) 31 december 2017
3-year-old: The house is on fire!
Me: It's a candle.
3: Call 911.
James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) 30 december 2017
5-year-old: *drinks water*
7-year-old: If you get too hydrated, you'll explode.
5: *spits it all out*
James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) 30 december 2017
5-year-old: Where are the pig's shoes?
Me: Pigs don't wear shoes.
5: *has a million dollar business idea*
James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) 29 december 2017
3-year-old: My belly doesn't want to go to sleep.
Me: Why not?
3: Tacos.
That makes complete sense to me.
James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) 29 december 2017
5-year-old: How do you know if you have laser eyes?
Me: Um, you melt the stuff you look at?
5: *looks at me hard*
James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) 28 december 2017
5-year-old: I closed my eyes last night and now it's morning.
Me: That happens.
5: I think I can time travel.
James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) 28 december 2017